Friday, August 26, 2016

Here's Donald Trump's top pick for Secretary of State

lindsay lohan will be donald trump's sec of state

Why are you laughing?

This dumbass has been braying since the primaries began about how he was only going to have the best people around him . . . how he was this great judge of talent . . . they'd be winning so much people would get sick of it . . . yada, yada, yada.

By any impartial analysis, his campaigns, both for the nomination and now the Presidency, have been a disaster of epic proportions, a nightmare of mismanagement. Need an example? Okay. We're less than 75 days out from the election and Team Trump has only just now hired their national field director.

?!?!?!

But he's a great hire, you say. 'Cause Trump only hires the best, right? Oh yeah. This guy, Bill Stepien, is a former Chris Christie aide, whose prominent role in the infamous Bridgegate scandal got him fired and also cost him a spot on Christie's team for the Gov's Presidential run.

So . . . OH YEAH BABY! Two big thumbs up for this guy! Totally yuge!

I mean honestly, if it were it not for the $2 billion in free advertising thrown Trump's way by the media, we'd be talking about Rubio v Clinton or Cruz v Clinton or Walker v Clinton right now.

But look at Lindsay here, she's got it totally going on. Despite almost no marketable skills, and a reputation practically on life support, she always finds someone to pay her rent at the Chateau Marmont. She gets shieks and sultans and bigwigs around the world to fly her overseas to be their arm candy for this event or that.

Despite absolutely nothing happening in terms of a career in movies or music, she's always on the top of every celeb/tabloid blog or newsfeed or whatever. She might be second only to the spray-tanned buffoon himself in free advertising from the media.

And now comes news that she's negotiating to appear on some show in Russia called Let them talk.

Her asking price? $860,000 plus full and effective security during her stay. Plus a fully paid suite at the Ritz Carlton (they have one of those in Russia?). Plus a meeting with Vladimir Putin.

Wanna bet that she gets it? You think John Kerry could negotiate a deal like that? His idea of a bargaining chip is some coke-addled warbler from the 60s. Don't know how Linds manages to wrangle the goodies like she does, but if his yugeness is looking for the "best" person to be Secretary of State in a Trump administration, I'm sure he'll have Linds on the short list, 'cause she's his kind of celeb/negotiator.

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